Well 3 and a half weeks away from stepping into a new season of life. FATHERHOOD...It took me a long time to actually process this. It started out with not really knowing what to think. Going in to see her for the first time was a true wake up call...I never imagined what it would feel like to actually take part in creating another human life. I mean, that was the easy part what is next is where the challenge lies. I actually have the responsibility of completely molding another life. At first just the idea of that freaked me out beyond words. I would say; "What have I got myself into," and things like that.
I really started praying about this thought, meditating on this idea of fatherhood. I remember literally looking up in the shower one day and saying out loud;"How do you do it?" A few words came to my mind, Love, patience, perseverance. Then I felt like I heard the "Father" say to me you do not have to do it alone, I am here with you. Immediately I felt a weight lift off my shoulders and a peace. Yes I am going to be a dad but my Father will always be there to help me be a father. I have a huge responsibility ahead of me, I understand that raising a child and molding a life is not easy but what a "hope" I have found(Literally Savvy Hope haha). I kind of chuckle saying that because it is cliche but it is so true. I would not fail Savannah in the slightest if all I did throughout all of her upbringing was soley rely on God to help get me through it. She would be better for it and that is the truth. Yes we will mess up in some decisions and she will pick up on some of our personality traits(good and bad), but in the end I hope she will read this and agree that I did everything I could to get out of the way and allow God to mold her into the mighty woman that she WILL be one day. I thank God for where we are now in our lives, for the support group that we have around us, for great parents on both sides to look at and most of all for a daughter. Savannah Hope Windsor!!
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